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Seraphyna
Forum Moderator
Joined: 29 Mar 2008
Points: 5,059
Posts: 2733
Identity: Psychological Polywere
Location: United States
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 Memories
What I remember of my final time as a celestial
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I thought I'd share what I remember of the events that led to me being incarnated here...it's a bit emotional for me to discuss so be kind...
Seraphyna was my name, well my name in a form pronounceable by human vocal cords...I took it as my confirmation name when I was still being forced into Catholicism by my parents....anyway, I am a Balancer (see topic: Balancers for details)…and here’s a tidbit on my celestial form proper: I was somewhere between 5'6-5'9'' ish tall. Long curly (think banana curls) red hair I think my eyes were some version of grey or violet, though I'm not sure. I was usually wearing really light and flowly dresses...mostly of the light grey/silver variety, though I also have memories of me in a brilliant white/silver chainmail flowy dress-like armor thing. I had either one or three sets of wings. If one pair, they changed; if three sets, I had one pair of each of the following: pale grey feathered wings, dark leather "draconic or demon" wings, and a pair that was a hybrid of the two. As for my other forms I’m aware of thus far…one is a tiger occasionally with flaming paws and shoulderblades. The other is a lioness-dragon hybrid type of gargoyle. I’m currently exploring the possibility of having a mermaid aspect, I’ll let you know when and if I figure it out definitively.
Anyhow, I was betrothed, but never loved the mate that was chosen for me (as was the point of betrothals) and fell in love with a being named Sepherious. The other man knew that he could do nothing to sever, prevent, or cease our love and stepped aside, still in love with me himself, but knowing that he didn't have the remotest of chances. There was nothing he could do short of destroying Sepherious to get me back. Thus, I knew that I would have to protect Serpherious from the other Balancers. I knew that they would most likely seek to destroy him in order to “save” me from jeopardizing my neutrality. So I sought to gain as much power as possible. The more my power grew, the more I lost sight of myself…of what I was, what my duty was. I wanted to be akin with the gods so that I could keep him safe…it was that kind of love, the deep eternal kind you’ll do anything to protect. The cliché really is true…power does corrupt. I lost sight of myself entirely…
…and, I was a fool. I ended up cheating on Sepherious with a being named Vandon. I never forgave myself, seeing what this quest for power had turned me into. Knowing that no one could destroy me, save the Source Hirself (who wouldn’t because I made my choice and thus had to do what I had to do) I banished myself from a celestial existence.
How? Well I remember consuming myself in white hot energy for what I thought would be an eternity of conscious death, but instead got me incarnated here on a learning vacation I assume to get “love out of my system or something”…like that’s possible.
Soon after I “left”, Sepherious and my betrothed were in a great battle where Sepherious was defeated and imprisoned in an emerald talisman. Everyone involved has, at this point, been reincarnated, destined to play out our roles in something of the human “apocalypse” or some kind of great change, which is apparently closer at hand than I ever thought it could be.
Once my memories came back to me (mind you they're still incomplete and a smidge fuzzy), I was devastated. I blame myself for everything that happened, as well I should right? Sepherious may not even know who he is, but he’s here…I know it. I feel he’s been in my dreams, which have a thread of their own poking around.
My betrothed and Vandon are around somewhere and have more power and complete memories than I do...which may be a dangerous development...a few years ago I was in touch with both of them via IM, but have since basically lost touch for better or worse.
That's about all I've got. The memories I have are quite disjointed, a name and a picture coming in here or there needing to be placed together until it's all figured out. I've done two past life visualizations and have seen myself standing atop a waterfall in a vast city with tall buildings that are silver spirals (The Silver City). I always think this is a little interesting side note: I have a birthmark (it was much bigger at birth) over my chest where the energy began when I tried to destroy/banish myself long ago...I was born with a big red mark on my chest, it's now very very small....but there you have it.
Just thought it was time to type out what I have, given in very little detail, in the way of my last memories as a Balancer before my incarnation here.
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 Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2008 5:08 am
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My site: http://seraphyna.ucoz.com/
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sadstoryteller
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Joined: 26 Oct 2008
Points: 57
Posts: 326
Identity: Dragon
Location: United States
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i understand how you feel a little bit. I am a dragon so i don't really understand all of the energy thing but i can realte to you on the part of trying to protect loved ones from danger. I got unlucky, i was killed infront of my loved one and all i can remember is her face crying right in front of mine before i died in her arms
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Posted: Thu Oct 30, 2008 1:19 am
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The rise of dragons will come some day
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creepy creeper
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Joined: 11 Sep 2008
Points: 70
Posts: 212
Identity: Unknown Demon
Location: Canada
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Kinda the same here,I dont speak much of it...partly cuz its still a blank to some extent...
I now have come to realize I was/am a demon...I had a lover I assume I demon also.
I died infront of her as she died infront of me.
all I do know is in my time I killed many "holy" beings and even more humans...its still largely a blank and all very odd.
I dont look into it tbh but its slowly becoming clear to me...even if I dont want it to type thing.
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Posted: Thu Oct 30, 2008 2:54 am
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(insert witty sig here)
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ulhraiesir
Member
Joined: 29 Jul 2008
Points: 40
Posts: 309
Identity: Midnight/Shadow Dragon Hybrid
Location: United States
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So far I can only remember bits and flashes of my childhood... Its killing me. Id rather die 100 deaths then live in ignorance without a know purpose.Still though, I remember alot of fighting over myself, until my mother and father had settled down. I wont go over it all here because this is not my thread, and I have school soon DX (I hate school....  )
You can message me for details though!^^
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Posted: Thu Oct 30, 2008 10:55 am
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The darkness hardens the heart. But it doesn't make the person evil. - Xenorosth
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